Wednesday, December 13, 2006
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Wednesday, December 13, 2006 ~
Have u ever wonder how it will be like if u carn see.
To me to worse situation is in the dark when i can only used my instinct to feel.
It is so insecure and scary.
Well today my grandma had been diagnose with permenant blindness of the right eye and it may spread to the left one.
Although i know its none of my fault but somehow i still ask myself is this because she din eat the fish she give it to me when i childishly wasted or is it because she always has to sew the little holes on my clothes when i ws young.
If possible i would rather be the one who is blind but there is no way to be true.
What can i do now.
They say its in the genes that our right eye is poorer.
It really doesnt bother me.
i know i can survive being unable to see.
Afterall i had been adapting to living in darkness.
So why must it always be the oldest person.
For once she seems no longer to multi-solver i have once know.
She is so weak.
Oh please tell me this is only a dreamt.....
Sunday, December 10, 2006
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Sunday, December 10, 2006 ~
I think it had been a long long time since i last blogged.
Not because that i am lazy or what just that i think who will even care to stop and look at how things are going on for me.
sadly things are totally different from what it always had been.
people get together
people seperate
so funny how we used to swear about things ahd after years it is just a comment
in the 7 days not in singapore i learnt a lot from people younger than me.
seeing those children telling each other we must meet up after ... i think i saw myself.
at that moment i wondered will this promise still be stick after 10, 20 or 50 years
well no one will know
Sunday, July 16, 2006
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Sunday, July 16, 2006 ~
i am sick of everything!!!!
i hate everything.
and its very tiring to hate.
please i want to get away.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
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Thursday, June 15, 2006 ~
Friends what are they for?
Are they someone who can share your happy moments?
Are they someone who run away whenever you have problems to share?
Are they the ones who will avoid your calls?
Somehow i am tired of trying to define what exactly does this simple words means.
After so many years, my bestest friend told me that she become less willing to tell what's on her mind and feels that she should not call when she's in need.
I think i am lousy to have her to say that.
Things changes so does people.
But i rather they stay where they are and not change at all.
To me change means lossing.
May be i am just being to selfish.
Anyway tomorrow will be a very very nice days.
week days are coming over to my house for a day!!
i really missed them:(
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
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Wednesday, June 07, 2006 ~
somtimes i wonder why i so forgetful.
today then i realised that i lost something ver impt!!!
but i know it can never be found again:(
anyway i filp through my primary school autograph book.
the sad part is none of the people that once said friends forever had manage to stay in contact after all these years.
what exactly is the meaning of this word then? i think many of times we used this as a polite and standard word to address to people.
on the other hand it is always so heart warming to how how my aunt had manage to keep her friendship for over 30yrs.
she is an example i will follow closely.
here is a little story...
porcupine has spikes on their body.
however when they are cold they need to huddle together to provide heat for each other.
this will cause him to hurt each other.
then they will move away from each other.
coldness drive them back together.
while pain pull them apart.
in this manner they move away and come closer,
unitl they find a comfortable position
where they don't hurt each other and are able to keep warm.
this apply to relationship between people.
no matter how close two person are, they need to have a small distance where they will not hurt each other. it is amazing how this small distant between people can make a relationship last.
so have you found the suitable position where you should stand?
these fews days have been studying. time really pass very fast its 148 days to another A levels.
this time round no more regrets no more sorrys.
i promise myself thyis will be the last chance.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
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Thursday, June 01, 2006 ~
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Thursday, June 01, 2006 ~
i think its the first english word i hated most.
it have been the only excuse my parents gave for not being present on my first PTI, my first performance etc.
for over 18 yrs i have been thinking that this is the big word used by adults.
but i was wrong.
more and more of my friends are begining to use this word.
not that i dont understand.
just that i feel like another part of me is being left alone again.
may be i am over dependent on them.
afterall who will understand how it feels to be in a room of walls with only radio as the only factor to determine that i am still in this world.
fews days ago i was overjoyed that holidays finally came.
however it took only a few days that i realised this holiday will not be as interesting as the previous one.
firstly i have to go visit the chinese sin seh for 20 consecutive days,
then i am not going overseas,
lastly all my friends are busy with their own life.
thinking back i am really very useless,
everyone seems to live their life so fully but the only friend i have now is textbooks, tys and my house.
whatever it is i will just continue to live my life. afterall it had been 7 yrs since i learnt to live on my own now i will just to adapt back to those kind of life.
so dear friends, dont feel sorry to me, i know you all have your own busy life to carry on.
you all have been around with me to provide enough strength and support. thanks for that. now i will only have to walk alone. i know can do it and i have to.
Friday, May 26, 2006
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Friday, May 26, 2006 ~
it have been a very very long time since my last post i guess.
everything is begining to be back to normal now.
now when i finally get adapted back to sch its holiday again.
sometimes life is really very amazing.
the day when one man passed away, is the same day which his niece give birth to a baby.
i guess this is how our population is sustain one go and one come.
things may not be so simple as what we always thing.
but when life is already so complicated why must some people make it worse.
